Thursday, November 5, 2009
A New Normal…
Before I left for Ecuador, I was talking to one of my friends about all the things I was freaking out about… mostly Spanish to be real honest! And he told me, “Don’t worry. It’s just a New Normal.” I just gave him that ‘I have no idea what you are talking about’ look. And he said, “Look, think about all the times you started something. How nervous were you the first time you stepped into Starbucks on your first day of work? And now its no big deal. You could do it in your sleep.” He had a point. At some point in every stage of life there is a New Normal. Something that is New right now but by the time you leave it, it’ll feel as Normal as breathing.
Today I bought my ticket to come back to the United States and I was having a hard time breathing. People keep asking what I am planning on doing once I come back and to be honest I just don’t know. There is nothing I am feeling extremely passionate about doing and to be honest, that scares me. But just last night I was reading my journal from when I first got here to Ecuador and I actually had a good chuckle. It was all so NEW; learning Spanish, making friends, living in a foreign country. I actually wrote: I am so proud of myself. I walked home all by myself today. Now it feels so normal, I think of it LESS than I think of breathing! It used to be a new that scared me to death… but now it’s my life that I’m having a hard time leaving. Moving back to the States feels like I’m starting all over again… with the new. Hopefully one day it’ll feel normal again.